One Liners"My girlfriend is weird. She asked me, 'If you could know how and when you were going to die, would you want to know?' I said, 'No.' She said, 'Okay, then forget it.'"
"Computers let you make more mistakes faster than any other invention in human history, with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila."
"For safety's sake, I try not to go to the ATM at night. I also try not to go with my four-year-old, who screams, 'We got money! We got money!'"