Kids' Proverbs

I don't care if you call them adages, proverbs, maxims, aphorisms, famous sayings, or whatever. The point is, kids have a whole different slant on them than you or I.

A teacher gave a group of young students well known quotes to finish as they saw fit. Below are the results:

A rolling stone...
plays the guitar

The grass is always greener...
when you remember to water it

A bird in the hand...
is a real mess

No news is...
no newspaper

It's better to light one candle than to...
waste electricity

It's always darkest just before...
I open my eyes

You have nothing to fear but...
homework

If you can't stand the heat...
don't start the fireplace

If you can't stand the heat...
go swimming

Never put off until tomorrow what...
you should have done yesterday

A penny saved is...
nothing in the real world

The squeaking wheel...
gets annoying

We have nothing to fear but
our principal

To err is human...
to eat a muskrat is not

I think, therefore...
I get a headache

Laugh and the would laughs with you. Cry, and...
someone yells, "Shut up!"

Better to light a candle than to...
light an explosive

It's always darkest before...
midnight

Early to bed and early to rise...
is first in the bathroom

A journey of a thousand miles begins...
with a blister

There is nothing new under...
the bed

The grass is always greener...
when you put manure on it

Don't count your chickens...
it takes too long