Short Jokes

Smile....it's the 2nd best thing you can do with your lips.

Why do brides smile when walking down the aisle?
Because they know they have given their last blowjob!

'Pee' Nuts?
When tested, researchers found 30 different trace elements of urine in a bowl of peanuts taken from the bar of a pub!

"Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to someone else."

How can you tell if your wife is dead?
The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

What do they call kids born in whorehouses?
Brothel sprouts.

Did you hear about the gay guy who wears a nicotine patch on his penis?
He's down to about three butts a day!

What do Fred Flintstone and Saddam Hussien have in common?
They both live next to rubble!

Those who judge don't matter and those who matter don't judge.