QuickiesQ: What is the difference between a 69 and driving in the fog?
A: When driving in the fog, you can't see the arsehole in front of you.
Q. Why is air a lot like sex?
A. because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any.
Q. What's a Polish 69?
A. You suck your thumb while you jerk off.
Q. Why are men like public toilets?
A. Because all the good ones are engaged and the only ones left are full of shit.
Q. What is the difference between a blonde and an inflatable doll?
A. About 2 cans of hair spray
Q. What is green, slimy and smells like pork?
A. Kermit's finger.
Q. Why do Scotsmen wear kilts?
A. Because sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.
Q. How do you know if a blonde did your landscaping?
A. The bushes are darker than the rest of the yard!