Bumper Stickers

I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.

It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to paint it.

It's good to have self-confidence. It's just nice to have a reason for it.

A pessimist is a man who looks both way before crossing a one-way street.

Duct tape is like the force - it has a light side, a dark side, and is the stuff that holds the universe together.

69% of statistics are "as meaningless as undocumented information".........89% of the world's population knows that

If you can read this, you're in range.

I only kill to know I'm alive.

I didn't claw my way to the top of the food chain to eat ruffage!

When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my father did, not screaming in terror like his passengers.

A gaping chest wound is just nature's way of telling you to slow down.

Mashed potatos can be your friend.

I need someone real bad. Are you real bad?