Golf Dictionary

GOLF, noun.

[1] a game that consists of a lot of walking, broken up by disappointment and bad arithmetic.
[2] a game of opposites - the world's slowest people are ahead of you, and the fastest are behind.
[3] the most fun you can have without taking your clothes off {Chi Chi Rodriguez}.
[4] a colorful sport that keeps you on the green, in the pink, and financially in the red.
[5] a game which is allowed to be played on Sunday (under blue laws) because it was not considered a game by the law, but a form of moral effort.
[6] is like a love affair - if you don't take it seriously, it's no fun, if you do, it breaks your heart.
[7] a game a lot like taxation - you drive hard to get to the green, and then you find yourself in a hole.

GOLF CART, noun.

[1] A popular mode of transportation because, unlike a caddie, it can neither count, criticize, nor snicker.

GOLFER, noun.

[1] a person who yells ""fore,"" takes six, and puts down five;
[2] a guy who has the advantage over a fisherman - he doesn't have to bring home anything when he brags he had a great day.