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Glossary of Blonde Medicine

Artery...............................Study of paintings
Bacteria.............................Back door of a cafeteria
Barium...............................What doctors do when a patient dies
Bowel................................A letter like A,E,I,O,U
Caesarian Section....................A district in Rome
Cataract.............................Weird pontoon boat
Cat Scan.............................Searching for a Kitty
Cauterize............................Made eye contact with her
Colic................................A sheep dog
Coma.................................A punctuation mark
Congenital...........................Friendly
D & C ...............................Where Washington is
Dilate...............................To live long
Enema................................Not a Friend
Fester...............................Quicker
Fibula...............................Small Lie
Genital..............................Non-Jewish
G.I. Series..........................Soldier Ball Game
Hangnail.............................To Hang Pictures on
Impotent.............................Distinguished; well known
Labor Pain...........................Getting hurt at work
Medical Staff........................Doctor's Cane
Morbid...............................Higher Offer
Nitrate..............................Different then Day Rate
Node.................................Was aware of
Outpatient...........................Person who has fainted
Papsmear.............................Fatherhood Test
Pelvis...............................Cousin of Elvis
Postperative.........................letter Carrier
Prostrate............................Flat on your back
Recovery Room........................Place to do upholstery
Rectum...............................Damn near killed him
Secretion............................Hiding something
Seizure..............................Roman Emperor
Tablet...............................Small table
Terminal Illness.....................Getting sick at the Airport
Tibia................................Country in North Africa
Tumor................................Add a couple more
Urine................................Opposite of "You're Out"
Varicose.............................Near by
Vein.................................Conceited