Kiss My ...A group of people were touring Ireland. One of the women in the group was very nasty and is constantly complaining on everything. The bus seats are uncomfortable, the food is terrible, it's too hot, it's too cold, the accommodations are awful and so on.
The group arrived at the site of the famous Blarney Stone. "Good luck will be following you all your days, if you kiss the Blarney Stone," the guide said. "Unfortunately, it's being cleaned today and so no one will be able to kiss it. Perhaps we can come back tomorrow."
"We can't be here tomorrow," the nasty woman shouted. "We have some other boring tour to go on. So I guess we can't kiss the stupid stone."
"Well now," the guide said, "it is said that if you kiss someone who has kissed the stone, you'll have the same good fortune." "And I suppose you've kissed the stone," the woman scoffed. "No, ma'am," the irritated guide said, "but I've sat on it."